silly family

This past weekend we had our family portrait taken at Murray park. It was a beautiful day, and thankfully there are several pictures that turned out wonderfully to choose from--that we plan on sending out with our Christmas cards and enlarging for the wall in our family room. But for now, and for your entertainment, here are some outtakes...

Gene and I cracking up after trying to look "affectionate"

This is what little miss Morgan thought of getting her picture taken.

Sarah couldn't resist climbing the trees--it made for some great poses.

Gene with his arms full & Emma lovin' on her daddy.

Gene and I trying to pacify Morgan before every one falls apart.

Autumn 2008

things that fascinate me

There are a lot of things that I really enjoy in my life, sometimes on a daily basis. For instance, decorating and interior design--I LOVE walking through a model home, reading a decorating magazine or watching a remodeling show. Also, politics and current events--I LOVE watching the news, watching debates and getting involved in debates with family members over hot topics (my current favorite is the bail out on Wall Street, the housing market & financial crisis--btw, nothing recently has motivated me more to add to my food storage than the rumor of another great depression. The day before the Asian markets opened I took advantage of local case-lot sales--but I digress). Of course, education plays a HUGE daily role in my life and I'm always searching for fun lessons, getting involved in community education groups and thinking outside the box.

However, there are only a few things that, if they cross my path, will stop me in my tracks with the level of fascination I have for them, like watching a train wreck--I can't tear my eyes away no matter what. Namely: panic rooms, hurricanes and, oddly enough, bower birds. Weird assortment, I know. But I can't help myself.

The idea behind panic rooms or safe rooms is to allow you a space, completely undetected from the outside eye or even the blue prints of your house, to escape to in an emergency such as a natural disaster, intruder or just to hide your valuables. Perhaps my fascination began when I was very young and would play the game Clue--I mean who doesn't enjoy the idea of a secret passage way leading to a secret room? Perhaps because it encompasses my other passions of design/decorating (the panic room would have to be pretty as well as functional) and preparation, ie: food storage, emergency mitigation, etc.. Perhaps it began as a teenager. I remember watching Red Dawn--the 1984 movie about a Soviet Union/communist invasion on the United States and how guerrilla high school students had to hide for a while and then fight for our country. For a long time afterward, every now & then, I'd find myself day-dreaming about where I would hide were that to happen right then at that moment. For whatever reason I am fascinated about panic rooms, especially the elite, rich kind full of technical equipment...and lots of food.

One of the reasons I love the fall is that it is also hurricane season. Let me preface by saying I personally have never been in a hurricane--close, while living in North Carolina, but no cigar--and, of course, I don't enjoy seeing people end up homeless, get hurt or killed. But out of all the natural disasters out there the awesome destructive power of a hurricane fascinates me the most (the tornado and earthquake are dang near tied with it). I think it's the fact that among so many things that man can control, we cannot control the weather, and thus are reminded of the "finger of God" and humbled every now and then. Don't email me with rants on man and global warming, yada yada yada. I believe climate is cyclical. I also believe that Heavenly Father can & does control the weather...according to man; or our petitions to him, worthiness, etc. (the drought during the time of Pharaoh and Joseph, the drought ending with the saints paying their tithing). But think of it-- the fierceness and shear speed of the wind & water that it takes to knock homes off their foundation! I love watching the weather channel as the meteorologists track the course of the storm and as communities bunker down and prepare for the storm, how, often times, it brings people back to spirituality and service toward one another.

The Bower bird is a bird after my own heart. This is the cutest and most intriguing thing I've ever seen about the animal kingdom. I remember about 4 years ago seeing an episode of National Geographic about Bower birds and watching in awe as these cute, little, male birds decorated and organized their "love shacks" with various objects to attract a mate. No wonder I'm fascinated by them, there's two of my passions right there--decorating and organizing! I'm amazed that they have such a keen sense of color, I know they depend on the color of their wings to attract, but even so. In the episode I saw years ago David Attenborough moved only one single object to a different spot, while the bird was away, and upon returning the bird noticed it immediately and had to fix it. My type-A self can appreciate that. I just wish my husband was more like a Bower bird. ;) Here's some youtube of a Bower bird.

identity

I can't hold it in any longer--I'm gonna turn "spider monkey" on someone!

After weeks of trying to make sense of all the chaos on Wall Street... in the country... on Main Street, I've finally figured it out: We've lost ourselves. We've forgotten who we are.

While canning peaches, beets and blanching zucchini, I've been listening to Sean Hannity and Glenn Beck talk about the housing crisis and the banking crisis and corrupt Wall Street, and how we've turned the American dream of owning a home from the privilege that it is, into an entitlement. I completely agree! Somehow, no matter how little you make, or how seldom you might be able to make a payment, you deserve a home. And Mr. Stupid Bank, over there, will lend you the money because he wants to be "nice". The suggestion that you may not make enough money to make payments would be discrimination--we can't have that. (eye roll) I've heard the problem is that we, as a society in general, have become too nice and that, perhaps, we need to stop giving every kid on the soft ball team an award, so to speak. Here's my favorite thought on being nice:

"C.S. Lewis praises courage as the virtue that protects all other virtues. That is, it is courage which enables us to be truthful when speaking the truth may be risky; it is courage that backs up loyalty when loyalty is unpopular; it is certainly courage which makes patriotism meaningful in times of danger. By the same logic, I believe it is niceness which can corrupt all the other virtues. Niceness edits the truth, dilutes loyalty, makes a caricature of patriotism, hobbles justice, short-circuits honor, and counterfeits mercy, compassion and love."

(Elouise Bell, BYU today, January 1991)

So much for being nice. This $700 Billion bail out plan is just biding time until after the election (when the nice politicians can stop lying), then things are going to get a lot worse, I predict. And all because we've lost ourselves & panic. PANIC, thus creating a self-fulfilling prophesy--"If Dodge is gonna crash & burn, I'd better get out of Dodge now!" Hello, people! The stock market is a loooooooooong term investment, not a get-rich-quick scheme. The stock market crash of '29 took almost three years to hit rock bottom, and today we are just one or two "events" away from trouble. With the DOW free-falling the way it has been what would happen if we had another Katrina? another terrorist attack? or a political scandal?

But we've forgotten who we are. I was having a conversation with my dear friend, Rosann, a while back about the housing crisis. We found it interesting how many people get their "identity" from their homes, and that when someone else, the Jones' gets a bigger or better home, they too feel the need to upgrade. How did this happen? Personally, I blame the media and/or Hollywood... but only to a degree. Every movie, t.v. show or even commercial is decked out with top quality must have items, and it gives the illusion that these things are, or should be, easily obtained. If you're anybody note worthy. The commercialism simply. never. stops. *CHA-CHING* We buy stuff. Do we really need this much "stuff" (on "credit"-haha) in our lives? Is it really that important--our appearance to others? However, ultimately, we need to own the responsibility of our actions. When did a simple, modest home of basically 4 walls and a roof become not enough? People are trying so hard to get their identity, or fill a void, from their stuff; their homes, that they are foreclosing and losing everything. Including themselves.

So what gives us our identity? Is it our talents? What happens when some body else takes up that talent--maybe even excels at it--do we feel lost, give it up or move onto another one? Do we get identity from our kids? Personally, here's where I have a struggle, because I believe that my children are a reflection of my parenting. I take pride in their accomplishments and our futures are intertwined. Much of my identity is in being a parent. I've never hung my identity on my home though. I like decorating, but our home is a small, modest 30 year old rambler--that I hope to grow old in. But I'm more than a mother, a teacher, a wife, an artist. I was somebody before I had children, before all of that. Then, the other day, it dawned on me--"that's it! I'm a spiritual child of Heavenly Father. THAT is who I am to my core." Who we ALL are--to our very core! We, as a country, just need to remember that. It is exactly It's a Wonderful Life in real life! We are rich when we can love and are loved.

"Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal.

For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also."

(Matthew 6: 19-21)

I know society would be a heck of a lot happier if we simply remembered who we are and trusted in God and not man (or bank, or Mr. Bigwig). We are all children of God, and that will never change.

before and after

Gosh, it was what--about 2 years ago? --that I said I would post before and after shots of the remodeling projects of our house? Well, here they are...in part at least. Three rooms for now anyway. And, yes, I could pick apart each and every detail in every "after" shot since I'm never fully done, nor ever fully satisfied (in a my-tastes-change sort of way, not a spoiled-with-more-money-than-I-know-what-to-do-with sort of way. I wish). But regardless of a little trim here and a little touch up there, I think we've come a long way. Bear in mind that we lived in our basement for six months while we worked on the upstairs, and for the better part of a year lived among our construction in the basic elements of shelter, much like a This Old House episode (my favorite show).

That said the *after* effect has been done for, like, 5 years now with exception to the kitchen which was just semi-completed last May! Ugh! But, hey, I'm not willing to go into tens of thousands of dollars worth of debt just to have it be perfect right now at the same time (and thank goodness for that --what with the financial nightmare that lenders and greedy home owners have gotten us into, but that's another. livid. post).

THE FRONT ROOM

BEFORE: what this photo doesn't show is the textured wallpaper on every surface that doesn't have a mirror attached to it, and also the single-paned, cracked window to the left. The lovely carpet was grease stained and pulling up.

AFTER: replaced the ceiling fan with canister lighting, the window, added crown moulding, the wallpaper with paint and, of course, the carpet. (We also replaced the front door and outlined an entry way with wooden floor instead of continuing the carpet, but that's another photo another day.)

THE UPSTAIRS BATHROOM

BEFORE: more lovely mirror tiles to the right, and a light-blocking half wall to the left. Maybe they thought black would be slimming?

AFTER: We knocked out the half wall to open the space up to light, replaced the mirror tile look with wainscotting and maple flooring to give it a seaside/Cape Cod sort of look. Also replaced the toilet and sink/cabinet, of course. This photo doesn't show the white framed mirror and glass door medicine cabinet to the left.

And the coupe de grace...

THE KITCHEN (FOR NOW)

BEFORE: Oh where to begin?! Aside from every surface being black & white checkered, there was textured wall paper on one wall and a lovely hand *markered* mural of none other than Winnie the Pooh on the other wall. Yes, in the kitchen. And peach? At least try for a 50's retro look with some true pink or red and chrome. Hideous!

(no offense if any reader out there has this look and likes it. sorry.)

AFTER: It was a long time coming but, we replaced the floor, two cupboards, the dishwasher, painted our butts off and installed hardware! However, there will be future kitchen photos as progress is made, when we get our new kitchen table, etc.

Hope you've enjoyed your tour. :)

Next time: The outside facade, downstairs, and master bedroom

remembrance

My family 1972:

(back row l-r) Don, Dad, Mike (front row l-r) Carla, Mom, Jeff

Twenty five years ago today my Dad & oldest brother, Mike, passed away in a small plane crash. My dad was 41 years old and my brother was only 23 years old. Each year, around this time, I find myself thinking about them; my memories of them and wonder how things would've been different were they still with us. This year I especially miss them for some reason.

The older I get the more I realize that my limited memories of them are inconclusive of the people they really were, and I find myself wishing I knew them better. How would they feel about me as an adult? What would they think of my children? Also, the older I get, the more I rely on and appreciate stories, about them, from those who did know them better & spent more time with them, and I have to trust that they're accurate.

According to my mom, my dad was charming, a talented singer, personable & could talk a drowning man into having a glass of water. According to my uncle, my dad loved his family and had a testimony of the gospel... at one point, but also had a weakness of the flesh & for material things. I've heard stories of the fun things my dad would do; projects he would make, outings to the sand dunes with the boys, and his wonderful taste in all kinds of music. I've also heard stories about how my dad was too hard, too often on my brothers. Even I have a couple memories, from my very young childhood, of my dad losing his temper & spanking me and me left feeling bewildered. Of course I have plenty good memories as well; the two of us watching Saturday morning cartoons, him tickling me, us making crafts together & kissing his moustache when he had to leave or had just got home. To me he was just my dad--the bearer of flocked Christmas trees, the singer of Elvis songs and the builder of snow caves.

My brother was, by all accounts, a very talented pianist. He was musical and artistic and loved beauty. He was sensitive, sometimes too much so. He had a hard life in his short 23 years and made some poor choices that made it even harder. But he loved people and to serve and make friends.

Now that I'm a parent, and realize all too well how easy it is to take my loved ones for granted from time to time, or to occasionally take out my frustrations on them, I'm left to draw only one conclusion about who my dad really was. He was human. Not some super hero or mega-ultra-dad with perfect character traits. Sometimes it's easy to glorify someone when they're gone & no longer in our presence every day to remind us of their flaws. He was human. He gave, but he also took. He sang, but he also yelled. He was selfless, but also selfish....like the rest of us.

So, would things have been better if they were still with us? I don't know. I trust that Heavenly Father knows the answer to that question and that either way He wants us to be happy... on earth and in heaven.

my girls

This is the professional photo taken of Sarah, Emma & Morgan shortly after Easter '08. The color is a little off after scanning it in, and snap! that just reminded me that I had wanted to post other professional photos as well..... urgh!

20 years

This is my high school senior year photo (below). You're probably thinking the same thing that I've been thinking lately--"What the hell happened?" ;) We should all be so lucky to look as good as we did when we were 18 years young!

A couple weeks ago I attended my high school 20 year reunion. Many thoughts flooded my mind upon arriving. First, and for the most part, it was obvious that we're all in the same boat together--abundantly clear that we are now middle-aged folk, pushing 40! What the...? When did that happen? Upon a closer look it also became abundantly clear that certain people *peaked* in high school and have had a hard time facing their adult futures. Things that make you go hmmm. It also became clear, that for some, a life of hard drugs had taken it's toll! Sad. Of course I wasn't able to get very intimate or accurate life stories in the course of a 3 hour dinner/program, and I was left wondering what brought this person, or that person, to this point in their life.

At times it was a plain old freak show! Many classmates, who I thought would've turned out one way or another, infact turned out completely opposite from what I expected. Of course they could all say the same thing about me. I was very surprised, sometimes pleasantly, again and again. It was very fun to see so many old friends and remember how they impacted my life when we were young. I may not look like I did 20 years ago, and I have body parts heading South, but I am so glad to be where I am today and who I am today! The knowledge, relationships, experience and self-confidence that comes with age I wouldn't change for ANYTHING!!!

me at 18

The class of '88 at a hotel ballroom.

My old friend, Kim, and yours truly '08.

Old friend, Lisa, with red hair, old crush & our homecoming queen (standing w/ cup).

Old friend Carl (dated once), me & my friend from elemetary school, Michelle '08.

end of summer

I can't believe it's already officially fall! We enjoyed a couple more fun outings before the school year started. In August we visited the Dinosaur Museum but I forgot to take my camera--dangit! But the kids really enjoyed themselves as we were there for about 3 hours.

Earlier this month (September) I visited with my life-long friend, Rosann, and her new baby and enjoyed chatting while our girls played & ran around the park across the street from her home. We also visited the Hogle Zoo mid September. I loved watching Morgan's reactions to the animals--porcupines was her favorite, of all things. She squealed & ooh'd & aah'd. Other than that (and my high school reunion which is an entirely different post), I've been up to my eyeballs in zucchini--making bread, sauteing, roasting, and using them in soup and giving some away whenever I get the chance!

We are well into the school year here at home. Sarah's in 3rd grade this year and we're still using K12 curriculum, which means that she's required to take the typical state tests. She took the Iowa test (for grades 3, 5, 8) just this past week, and will take the CRT in the spring. So that's kept us busy, not to mention the socials, etc. However, this year we dropped the music, art & science subjects from K12 and opted for language arts, math & history only. We still include music, art & most definitely science into our day, but through different curriculums/websites, etc. She is flourishing and that's all that matters. Emma is still in preschool and getting her ABC recognition down as well as writing the letters.

And you thought I was exaggerating about my mountain of zucchini! This was taken before several more plants came on this week.

Little miss Morgan looooves my zucchini bread! Here she was crying that I didn't, at first, give her the bigger piece--a quarter of the loaf! Silly baby (she ate the whole thing).

Rosann's daughter, Sierra playing with Sarah & Emma.

The rare albino alligator--on tour through October.

Sarah riding a rare bronze rhino

Emma playing on the giant elephant trunk --that makes noise & blows water.


Morgan with her favorite animal--the porcupine.

This giraffe saw my camera and came over to take a closer look.

harvest

I can't believe it's harvest time already! Sure there are a few more weeks left, and some years we've been able to harvest well into October, but with the recent temperature drops (just north of here was 29 degrees last night) we're working early this year. I'm so glad that I planted a garden this year! Even though in the early spring it's such a pain to prepare the soil and weed the earth and tend to young sprouts we've managed to crank out a decent garden. In years past we tried our hands at growing peppers and beets but without success, but this year it seems like everything we planted just flourished, and I'm so thankful!

Our first fire of the season--proof that it was chilly the other night!

The fruits (or veggies) of our labor: zucchini (coming out our ears), tomatoes, cucumbers, peppers, beets, spaghetti squash, carrots, cabbage & lettuce (already eaten).

Our first successful beets--that will now be enjoyed steamed and diced in salads, etc.

Cayenne, Serrano, Anaheim and Bell peppers. I'm making oodles of salsa fresca and drying the rest.

What garden is complete without tomatoes; fresh roma & early girl in this case. These will go to make the salsa, also stewed tomatoes and, of course, in salads & BLT's!

camping

Every summer we get together with family and head somewhere to camp out, but our favorite spot, and one that keeps bringing us back again & again, is Palisade State Park . There are so many things to do there: fishing, canoeing, golfing, four-wheeling, biking, hiking and Six Mile Canyon is close for off roading.

Jeff & Felicia brought their ATV's and we rented a paddle boat & brought our bikes. Gene went out on the lake with the kids while some of us hit an early tee-time on the golf course for 9 holes. Being only my second time on a professional golf course I was ridiculously over par, but I had fun and actually made quite a few impressive moves.

After that we went out on the trails with the four-wheelers for a couple hours and that was way more fun than I expected! Then after lunch we each took turns with the paddle boats and jumping off the floating platform or swimming around. What a blast & super fun day--and everyone slept well that night! The day before was spent checking out the little towns 15 minutes away and setting up camp, and on the last day we ate a big breakfast but then broke down camp early and headed home since the kids were coming down with a head-cold.

the girls helping daddy set up the tent

our campsite shared with family

grilling yummy corn on the cob & chicken

our golf-cart caravan: Felicia (my caddy), Jeff & Lysette, Alyssa & Jordan

me with my charming nephew, Jordan (who's not a half-bad golfer btw)

Lysette *smooch*

yeah, lovely

Jeff teeing off

Lysette, Sarah & Alyssa heading off to the dirt trails

Gene and Emma heading off to the trails

We let Morgan run around nekked to air out her diaper rash

Sarah loves the outdoors and is a fish in water

Gene with Sarah on our battery powered floaty/jet ski

Gene with Sarah and Emma heading out on the paddle boat

(I would love to take pics of us all on the floating platform, but I'm not wanting to jeopardize my camera. Next year I'll buy a disposable water camera.)

crazed fans

The days have been slipping through my fingers and suddenly we're upon September?! Where'd the summer go? I have about 4 posts brewing in my head that I've fully intended on writing for the longest time now & updating this poor, neglected blog, but I need to bust a move on some other things first. Maybe in the next day or two. That said, here's some pictures of our midnight run for Stephenie Meyer's Breaking Dawn. I should've taken some shots of Lysette and I staying up until 7:00 am reading, munching & talking but forgot. (Thanks again Settie!)

Lysette storming out of the car at the suggestion that Bella & Edward might not get married.

The line to get inside Barnes & Noble wrapped around the entire complex and lasted until 2 am!

I ran into my cute niece, Hannah, in the crowd. (never saw Amanda, but later ran into Verle & Lori)

Crazed women hoping to catch Bella's bouquet and win a free copy of the book.

"Edward" and "Bella" (decent Edward, but I didn't care for the Bella)

"Alice" ran the show and walked around very fast like the pixie vampire she is.

After checking out the festivities at Barnes and Noble and getting our fill of a crazy party scene, we walked over to Walmart about 10 minutes to midnight because they were selling the book for only $13. While waiting they served "wedding" cake.

Felicia (practically being forced), Lysette & Amy (?) waiting in line

*squeal*

When we bought our copy we RAN home and stayed up all night reading! Fun!

*spoiler alert*

Breaking Dawn was overall enjoyable to read, but there was continuity missing--the style of writing Stephenie Meyer had with the first three books wasn't there. I really got annoyed with the details grasping to describe Renesmee growth "...she could even read." Ugh! Bella, only days old, having perfect control over her "bubble"? And that "fight" at the end could've been totally wicked awesome instead of fizzing out. Why build to a crescendo that doesn't happen? And where was the passion? I could not put down the first three books of this "saga", but there were times with Breaking Dawn that I actually ...fell asleep! What the...? That SO didn't happen to me in New Moon--which remains my favorite!